nohealani's Blog

Ghosts of poops past

A while ago, my husband pointed out something funny (yet gross) while walking our dog. Along our walking route, the grass along the main road is neatly manicured by our community association. I never noticed this until my husband pointed this out, but at various points along the way, there are tiny areas where the grass is extremely green. Now I know why.

We used to have cats that had set up camp in our back yard (they are now gone, long story). Normally, cats poop in a secluded area and bury what they leave behind. However, a few of the kittens in our bunch didn't get the memo and pooped out in the open on our lawn. After cleaning up the poop, my husband noticed that the grass would grow extremely green and robust in the pooped spot. Natural fertilizer.

Juxtapose this with what we see in the neighborhood. My husband pointed out, to my horror, that all the ultra-green spots in the community grass are the fruit of old pet poop!


Husband carrying wife's purse

This is another topic I blogged about some time ago, but only am only getting around to making public now--men who carry their wives' purses while shopping. I came across this topic while browsing another website. I thought nothing of it until I saw many fervidly negative opinions on the idea. Overall, the negative people outnumbered the positive by a ratio of about two to one.

Seriously, what's the big deal? I'm not talking about holding the purse all day while the wife goes tromping throughout the entire mall. I'm just talking about for a minute or two at a time when trying something on or sorting through a rack. If you ask me, that is the sign of a true gentleman. How does carrying one's wife's bag diminish a man's "man" status?

Though what really shocked me were the women who were strongly opposed to the idea. By saying that asking their husbands to hold their bags would subject them to humiliation or make them less manly, they are implying that their husbands are so insecure in their sexual identity that merely holding an innocuous, inanimate object is enough to induce a gender crisis.

Then there are those women who adamantly refuse to "impose" on their husbands. Are you serious? It's just asking him to hold a bag, not the entire inventory of the second floor shoe department. He's just standing there anyway (looking at the pretty salesgirls). If you have to tiptoe around simple requests like holding a bag, there are far deeper issues in your marriage that you will eventually have to come to terms with.

To those men who carry their wives' purses: bravo! You get it. 

Eternal love

I found this article about a farmer who, in tribute to his late wife, planted thousands of trees in his field to form the shape of a heart.

ht tp://

So beautiful.

Note: EP was masking the link. Remove the space in the "http" for it to work.


We've made a new friend at our house. There's a neighborhood cat who appears to have been abandoned by her owners, and I took it upon myself to start feeding her. Now she comes around to our house. My dog is ambivalent, and the cat seems to get along well with her.

Ugh. I hope I don't turn into one of those crazy old cat ladies with 200 cats all over the house.

This is a test post

Please disregard this post.

Just seeing if my blog posts are appearing. Lately they haven't been showing up as public.

Test 1 2 3...


Extreme Makeover... er... Extremely Funny Makeover

I just stumbled across this article. It shows before and after photos of what happens when husbands try to give their wives a makeover.

I think the (humorous) results speak for themselves.

In all fairness though, Mike did a good job with Carol's outfit.

All in fun.

Update: the link has been been fixed.


Thankfully, the tsunami that hit us in Hawaii was minor. Our damage has been predominantly in the harbors. As far as I know, there were no deaths or injuries.

However, if anyone reads these words, please keep the people of Japan in your prayers. The latest news update has listed the death toll in the hundreds, with many hundreds more missing.

Tsunami headed my way

A couple of hours ago, a massive earthquake hit off the coast of Japan. This resulted in a devastating tsunami in northern Japan.

As I type this, a tsunami is speeding toward my location here in Hawaii. It is a very sobering thought. I have confidence in our emergency infrastructure, and evacuations are now occurring in the low-lying areas. We are praying for the best, but are preparing for the worst.

The first wave is expected to hit us in just under 3 hours.

While I am not in an evacuation zone, there is still a sense of helplessnes as we wait.

Our only saving grace is the geographic distance we have from the epicenter of the earthquake. Because of this, we have several hours advanced warning to begin emergency preparations. The unfortunate souls in the Sendai area of Japan were not so fortunate. Because the quake occurred so close to shore, they had virtually no warning and no opportunity to evacuate or prepare for the tsunami. They are in our prayers.

- Nohealani

Just thinking out loud

I find that I am spending more and more time here at EP. I catch myself checking in for a few minutes, several times throughout the day. My husband doesn't know. I'm debating whether or not to tell him what I've been up to.

Basically, nothing that I have written on this website is a secret to him. But I don't know... the thought of revealing my private little corner of the internet is somehow very embarrassing.

I have learned a lot about male psychology here at EP. Some men have unusual eccentricities about them, and the stories, confessions, and experiences that others have shared candidly at EP have given me a great deal of insight. I feel that I understand certain aspects about my husband a lot better than I did prior to my becoming a member. I feel even closer to him now. Somehow I want to share this with him, but I don't know how.

I think I will tell him soon... I'm just not sure how to bring it up. Maybe I'm just overanalyzing this.  Eeek!

Deadly pantyhose: Wolford Fatal 15 and Fatal Lace

This is another one of those posts that I had locked away as private. I have re-worded a lot of it to make it presentable, and am now re-posting it publicly. My blog seems to have taken on a very reflective tone lately, so I think this post will help lighten things up a little. This is something fun and light-hearted: a pantyhose review.

I appreciate fine hosiery. I don't consider myself wealthy, but I do spend money to buy quality pantyhose. Even so, there is a mental barrier through which I have a hard time breaking. Normally, the most I'll pay for pantyhose (or tights) is in the upper-20 to low-30 dollar range. While I acknowledge that you do generally get what you pay for, I had always been satisified with the quality of hosiery I own within my maximum price range.

Quite some ago, I tried on my first pair of Wolford seamless pantyhose (which I got for free, but that is another story). Prior to that, I naively thought I had already experienced the pinnacle of fine hosiery with my Philippe Matignon, Cecilia de Rafael, and Falke (which, by the way, does tread into the Wolford price territory with their higher tiers). Essentially, I didn't think it could get any better.

I was wrong.

When I put on my first pair of Wolford Fatal 15 pantyhose, I couldn't believe what I felt. They were among the most comfortable pantyhose I had ever worn.

The magic is in the seamless brief. Somehow it felt like I was wearing pantyhose, yet I also felt naked, all at the same time. There is just a whispery, tantalizing sensation where the gusset would normally be. Normally, if I wear pantyhose with no underwear, I still feel a sense of security because of the gusset. With the seamless pantyhose, it feels markedly unbridled down there. It is very hard to describe without being too graphic.

The visual effect of the seamless brief is also quite shocking--with no gusset or seam, there is precious little to obscure any anatomical bits behind the fabric.

If you look straight down into the brief, you'll notice two very faint lines, each about an inch long, that frame the area which would normally have the gusset. I'm not sure what those lines are; they aren't seams, so I suspect that they are some artifact of the manufacturing process. They don't spoil the overall seamless effect, but I felt they were a peculiarity worth mentioning.

A sharp eye will also notice that there is a nearly invisible line that distinguishes the brief from the legs. The brief itself appears to be a V-cut, but it is difficult to discern unless one really looks for it. It doesn't detract from the overall appearance, however.

The finish is matte and powdery. It has more of a soft, plush feel, rather than a smooth, silky feel. There is a faint "shadow" reinforcement in the toes. The waistband is Oh-My-God comfortable; it is very wide and cushy, and sits somewhere between a low and mid hipster.

The waistband, while comfortable, is also the Fatal 15's weakness. I can't really say this is a problem per se, since normally, all my pantyhose will suffer a laddered demise long before the waistbands show signs of age. However, as I wear my Fatal 15s so infrequently, they tend to last a ridiculously long time. I have a couple of pairs in the back of my drawer whose legs and briefs have outlived the waistbands. In these pairs, the waistbands seem to have lost their elasticity and have become flaccid. Obviously, I can no longer wear them because of this, but I also can't bring myself to throw them out. I can't really remember when they were bought, but it must have been many years ago. My suggestion to avoid situations like this is to wear your Fatal 15 pantyhose often enough such that they suffer a normal "death" before the waistband gives up the ghost. That way, you'll maximize the number of wearings you'll get out of them.

I will take Wolford at their word that these pantyhose are 15 denier, but to me, they look and feel just a little thicker. This discrepancy is another point of contention I have with the Fatal 15. Anyone wishing to wear a 15 denier pantyhose may be misled by the product name into thinking that the Fatal 15s actually look like 15 denier. To me, they don't. Women trying this product for the first time with the intent of wearing 15 denier sheers may be disappointed at the overabundance of coverage. Thus, a little more planning must go into an outfit to account for this; treat the Fatal 15 as if you are planning for 25 to 30 denier hosiery, and you'll be golden.

The denier discrepancy aside, coverage is excellent. These pantyhose make me feel like a celebrity (well, one of those precious few who do wear hosiery). It is impossible to get them on wrong. They almost naturally want to settle on your legs such that the coverage is perfectly even from your ankles to your thighs.

Durability in terms of number of wearings is above average, but I believe that this has something to do with the, ahem, "15" denier fabric Wolford uses. While it feels soft and delicate to the touch, it is insanely resilient like a bungee cord. Seriously, the fabric is so stretchy that it is almost comical (in a good way). The garment as a whole is strong, but there exist critical stress points at the apexes of the "V" lines in the brief I mentioned earlier.

When you eventually damage your Wolford pantyhose, it is very depressing, even traumatic. For this reason, I do not recommend these pantyhose to anyone who is emotionally fragile. Although they are more durable than your average pantyhose, since they are classified as sheer, you should still exercise all the same cautions that you would for other sheers.

My all-time favorite pantyhose are Fatal Lace 15. They look virtually identical to Fatal 15, but have a wide, lace waistband. Since I have only been introduced to these fairly recently, it remains to be seen if these suffer from the same waistband "issue" that the plain Fatal 15s suffer from. All other commentary for the Fatal 15 applies. Wolford also has a thicker version called Fatal 50, but I have never tried it.

Another comment I'd like to make is in order to fully appreciate the seamless design, Wolford's Fatal product line must be worn without underwear. It's not just about losing the panty lines; the sensation from the seamless brief is really something to behold. Naturally, however, the lack of any gusset causes some logistical problems. Thus, I'd only recommend wearing them sans underwear for only a few hours at a time--a night out, for example; they are most likely not something you should wear all day.

In summary, I love Wolford's Fatal 15 pantyhose. My complaints about them are admittedly nit-picky. But would I recommend them to a friend? I will be blunt. If you are on a budget, no. You can do without these; it is akin to buying a Mercedes just to go grocery shopping. Do not stretch your finances for a piece of disposable underwear. If you buy these pantyhose with expectations of divine bliss and battleship-like durability, you will be disappointed--they are only pantyhose, not some magical vestments from heaven that will stop bullets or instantly slay men with their looks (though they come close).

However, if you pragmatically embrace pantyhose as a fashion accessory, enjoy spoiling yourself, have a husband that appreciates you in fine hosiery, and can afford to splurge every now and again, Wolford Fatal 15 are a good place to get your feet wet in the realm of luxury pantyhose. They have perfectly even coverage, feel nice, and make you look like a movie star. And the seamless brief--wow!

One final comment on the pronunciation of "Fatal"--it is not the typical fatal, which rhymes with cradle; it is pronounced fay-TALL. If you are fortunate enough to have a Wolford boutique in your city, remember this, so you can avoid a potentially embarrassing situation if you ask for it by name.

- Nohea

Relationships involving men who love pantyhose

This is a complicated subject, and one I felt compelled to address after having written my last blog post. It seems that the vast majority of the members in the pantyhose experience groups here at EP are men. I suppose this sort of makes sense, as pantyhose are not generally items that warrant a whole lot of topical discussion among women.

The subject matter of most of the male EP pantyhose stories generally involve a man's attraction to women in pantyhose, or a desire for a man to wear pantyhose himself. To these men: know that I do not judge you, and I truly wish the best for you in your endeavors.

But when it comes to the subject of involving your pantyhose fetish in your relationship with your wife, I think it may be easy to lose perspective, as for some men, these fetishes seem to be a major driving force behind their moods and actions. Often, perception and feelings toward a man's wife is often fluxed through the filter of how she deals with or accepts her husband's pantyhose fetish.

As you read these words, what I have to say may seem like common sense. Then again, it may not. If what I have to say comes across as preachy, so be it. I just want men to understand how this matter may be viewed from a woman's perspective. While I will be speaking about men with pantyhose fetishes, the spirit of this post can be applied to any type of fetish.

This post is addressed to the men out there who would like to have an open relationship with their wives regarding their love of pantyhose--whether it be a desire for their wives to wear pantyhose more often, or to wear pantyhose themselves. To those men, I sincerely hope that you be very considerate of your wife, and show some maturity if you don't always get your way.

Regardless of what fetish you may have, if you and your wife are able to genuinely enjoy it together, cherish what you have. It is something very special. Participating in something which is a common source of joy for both parties greatly strengthens a relationship.

A man wanting his wife to wear pantyhose, or a man enjoying wearing pantyhose himself, isn't in itself a bad thing. What is bad, however, is when that attachment to pantyhose escalates to the point of obsession, and becomes a necessary requirement for happiness in a relationship. That's when the harmless fetish becomes a destructive one.

For some men, it is possible that pantyhose have displaced their wives as the focal point of their physical and psychological fulfillment. This is wrong. No woman should ever be relegated to being just a warm body that wears pantyhose; or, merely some means to fulfill some fantastical desire.

Guys, if it is difficult for you to perform with your wife unless some aspect of pantyhose is involved, take a step back. Your wife should be the most important thing in your relationship, not an inanimate piece of nylon and Lycra. It is one thing to be dependent on Viagra due to medical reasons. It is a completely different matter to be dependent on a psychological stimulus like a fetish item.

I'm not saying that you have to give up your fetish. As I have said before, having a fetish, in itself, isn't a bad thing. What I am asking is that you be considerate of your wife. If she is 100% fine with you involving pantyhose in your endeavors 24/7, great. But if she needs a break (as even I do from time to time), be sensitive to her feelings.

Readers of my previous posts know that I really love pantyhose. So does my husband, and I would venture to say that he probably likes pantyhose more than I do. However, our lives do not revolve around pantyhose; our lives revolve around each other. That's the way it should be. I'm not saying that we are the model couple, as we naturally have our share of problems. However, pantyhose are never the source of those problems.

To the men who understand and practice what I have talked about, I applaud you because you "get it." I optimistically believe that this is how it is with most men who have wives that accept their fetish. However, to the remaining men, I ask that you reflect on what is most important to you. If your wife has accepted your fetish, it is because she loves you, and wants you to be happy. But please don't take advantage of that, or take it for granted.

I guarantee that your love of pantyhose isn't the only thing your wife is accepting about you--there are many other unspoken things that we contend with on a daily basis, yet accept them because we love you. I guess what I'm trying to say is don't overwhelm your wife with your pantyhose fetish. Don't hold a grudge against her if she needs a break--if you have come to that point, I'm sorry to say that you are now putting your fetish before your wife; the object has become more important than the human being wearing it. Such a circumstance will eat away at a relationship like cancer.

Maybe I misunderstand or underestimate the psychological attachment some men may have to pantyhose. But I can only try to understand it in the context of how I would feel if I were to make an unusual request of my husband. I would be elated and grateful if he were to indulge me in any hypothetical desires I may have. But I would also do my best to temper those desires if he felt he were being inundated with them. It's good to enjoy them sometimes, but not all of the time.

Understand that relationships are about give and take. Perhaps you could do certain things that your wife asks of you? Whether she is extremely enthusiastic or just accepting of your pantyhose fetish is irrelevant. Your wife is doing what she can to make you happy; please reciprocate that commitment.

- Nohea

My views on men who wear pantyhose

"Are there women who like men in pantyhose?"

I will attempt to explain my thoughts on the subject. Obviously, I do not speak for all women. However, pantyhose issue aside, I believe that what I have to say may give a very generalized understanding of what women see in a man--pantyhose or not.

Do I like men in pantyhose? Before I answer that, I want to make clear that for the few of us women that actually like pantyhose, our reasons are probably very different from the reasons men may like to wear them.

I consider myself to be very perceptive. From what I have gathered in the months that I have been here (and elswhere), it appears that many pantyhose-wearing men wear pantyhose for one or more of the following reasons (excluding any medical reasons):
  • It is a fetish
  • There is some sort of thrill to wearing them in public
  • It is one element of a broader desire to crossdress
Do any of those reasons sound familiar?

I can't pretend to understand the psychology behind those reasons. However, if it satisfies a certain need, and doesn't harm anyone, I don't think it's bad for a man to wear pantyose.

So, do I like men in pantyhose?

I debated whether or not to touch this subject. It is not important to reveal what prompted this to become a blog topic. Suffice it to say, I have decided to air my thoughts on the matter because I think it may help some men understand, in some small way, what makes me tick. I think this would also be a good opportunity for me to give some gentle fashion advice to men who may be considering wearing pantyhose publicly.

Those who have read my humble words here on EP already know that I like to wear pantyhose. With that in mind, what I have to say regarding men in pantyhose may surprise you.

I mentioned what I perceive to be the reasons why men like to wear pantyhose are, because I think many pantyhose-wearing men would like to fantasize that women who enjoy pantyhose themselves are somehow "turned on" by the sight of a man in pantyhose. While there may be women like that out there, in my humble opinion, such women are exceedingly rare.

Understand that there is a distinction here between women who are genuinely "turned on," and women who lovingly accept and indulge their pantyhose-wearing husbands or boyfriends.

It is true that I love pantyhose. But in general, I wouldn't be "turned on" by seeing a man openly wearing pantyhose in public; it is neither a "turn on" nor a "turn off" in and of itself. If a man were to openly wear pantyhose in public, I would hope that in doing so, such a man isn't being daft about the look he is trying to achieve. I'm not talking about men who publicly wear pantyhose for shock value, or those who deliberately try to elicit a reaction from other people. I'm talking about men who try to wear pantyhose as part of their normal clothing.

Where I live, I personally haven't seen any men openly wearing pantyhose in public. I'm not saying there's anything good or bad about that; it just happens to be the demographic here. This doesn't necessarily mean that men here don't wear pantyhose; if they do, it's probably under their regular clothing, so I would never notice.

However, if I were to come across a man openly wearing pantyhose, how would I react? To be honest, it's hard to say without ever having confronted such a situation. I imagine I'd probably have mixed feelings about it. The issue isn't whether or not a man enjoys wearing pantyhose--some men just do. I get that. And, I'd assume it would be for one of the reasons I mentioned previously. I have no problem with the fact that some men like to wear pantyhose.

The real issue for me would probably be that in most cases, it would probably look very odd. From what I gather, it seems to me that many pantyhose-wearing men would like to just throw on a pair of pantyhose, throw on a skirt or some shorts, go walking down the street, and be accepted by everybody.

Understand that most people would be put off by the sight of a man in pantyhose; putting little thought into one's overall appearance would only serve to further drive public consensus toward the negative. My hope for men who would openly wear pantyhose is that they not get so caught up in the thrill that they lose sight of their overall look. Done smartly, properly shaved, and with great care and coordination, I do believe it is possible for a man to achieve a stylish look with fasionable hosiery. If a man wishes to openly wear pantyhose in public, I feel that he is obliged to show some class and sensibility when assembling his outfit.

Why such a high standard for men? Because there is basically no paradigm for such accessorization for men. I instinctively know how to coordinate pantyhose with my own outfits. In contrast, I have no point of reference when it comes to incorporating pantyhose into men's daily attire. I do have a general idea of what might look good or bad. Even so, it is hard to say without actually seeing it in practice. Thus, I feel the safest place to start in terms of attire would have to be the most conservative.

As I've said before, I have no problem with the fact that a man might want to wear pantyhose. But if he is going to wear them in an unfashionable manner while in public, I have no desire to see it. Mind you, the same goes for women, as they are sometimes just as guilty. (In fact, some women may be even worse--since they are women, they think they can get away with anything.) The point here is that I just don't care to observe pantyhose (or any other) fashion blunders--in men or women--because it demonstrates a lack of care or self-awareness in one's personal appearance.

Fashion considerations aside, I am sure that some men would have great legs in pantyhose. But as I have mentioned earlier, the wearing of pantyhose in and of itself is neither a "turn on" nor a "turn off." In my view, a man's attractiveness inherently exists within him regardless of what he is wearing. If I find a man appealing, it's not just because he's dressed a certain way. A man's personality, sensitivity, intelligence, and god-given appearance are what make him attractive. Clothing can enhance a man's appeal, but will never form the basis for it.

It is probably no surprise that, yes, my husband does wear pantyhose. I will only reveal that:
  • I accept and love him completely
  • We thoroughly enjoy the time we spend together in pantyhose
  • His only desire is to wear pantyhose; he is not a full-blown cross dresser
  • He does not wear pantyhose openly in public; they are always hidden beneath his regular clothing
  • He is very considerate; he doesn't allow pantyhose to dominate his mood or thoughts, and understands that sometimes it's better to leave them aside
The remaining details of our relationship are not relevant to this discussion.

I mentioned my husband because there is a certain duality with my attitude towards pantyhose-wearing men. Do I find my husband appealing? Definitely. Even in pantyhose? Yes, but not because he is wearing pantyhose. I find him very sexy, but it's everything about him, not the fact that he wears a certain piece of clothing.

True, I happen to think my husband looks really good in pantyhose. Of course, since he doesn't wear them openly, he doesn't need to match them with his outfits. Thus, in the privacy of our own home, he looks good in virtually any kind of pantyhose.

Admittedly, I am sure a lot of my biased perception stems from the immense love we have for each other. So, is this a double standard? Absolutely not! It is completely natural to be wholly enamored with the one you love. Traits that you look upon with ambivalance in other people are seen under a very different light with your loved one. That is the nature of love; it cannot be rationalized. If you truly love your partner, you will know exactly what I am talking about.

And, if you are completely commited to your spouse, nobody will light your fire in quite the same way that he or she does. I admit that somtimes, other "handsome" men may catch my eye; but that's all they are--eye candy. The only man that "does it" for me is my man--whether or not he is in pantyhose.

On a final note, I must point out to pantyhose-wearing men who have accepting wives that there is a difference between loving your wife, and loving your wife because she wears pantyhose or accepts your wearing of pantyhose. This is something I hope to address in a future post.

- Nohea

Blogging is fun

This is just a fun little post about the joy I have found in blogging.

I have never kept a written journal or diary, ever. I initially joined EP to vent about certain things that were going on in my social sphere. A happy byproduct of this is that I have discovered how therapeutic it is to write about my experiences and opinions.

My words are available to millions of people to see. Yet, I can remain safely anonymous.

I actually have MANY blog entries, but I have kept the vast majority of them private. I simply enjoy putting my thoughts in words, and keeping them secretly and eternally posted here at EP.

This blog is my journal. I can speak candidly without worry of my coworkers or anybody else discovering what I am really thinking. It is fun to get things off my chest, or confess certain sins with no fear of retribution.

I love to eat dark chocolate.
I love dogs. I secretly wish I could take all the stray dogs I come across to a shelter.
I am a very cheap drunk; I get tipsy from half a light beer.
Sometimes I scrape the white filling off of Oreo cookies, and just eat the crispy part.
My coworkers are generally good people, but sometimes they are just so clueless.
I don't understand sports, but it's still fun to cheer on my home college team.
I love diamond jewelry.

The words I write here, I assume, will persist long after I have gone. Blogs are magical and eternal. I have discovered the joy of blogging.

- Nohea  :-)

Why I love pantyhose

I have been asked by more than one EP member why I love pantyhose so much, but until now, I hadn't responded with commentary on the matter (see my previous post on why I don't respond to messages). Recently, I was asked the same question by another member--one for whom I admit I have some admiration. Thus, I will try to elucidate my thoughts.


When I was young, I wore tights in school, as did a couple of my friends. While we didn't dress identically, we all apparently had an influence on each other's choice of apparel. Our school had no dress code, so we dressed this way out of choice. While I regularly wore tights and dresses with my friends, I also looked forward to when I would be able to wear real, "adult" pantyhose.

In my final year of elementary school, for the girls' Lei Day performance, we were required to wear pantyhose with our costumes. After school that Lei Day, I changed out of my costume, but left my pantyhose on. Somehow they made me feel very grown-up. I remember asking my mother if it would be okay for me to wear pantyhose more often, and she said it would be fine. Apparently, my two friends had had similar discussions with their mothers, as for the remaining weeks of the shool year, we'd each show up in school wearing pantyhose on different days.

In intermediate and high school, I wore pantyhose more often. In college, due to peer pressure, I wore them much less while on campus. But I always wore opaque tights or pantyhose whenever I went out.

In retrospectively analyzing my behavior during these periods in my life, I have made some realizations. I will try to put these realizations into context.

The Herd Mentality

Over the years, I have observed that we females often mindlessly follow prevailing trends when it comes to fashion. Even worse, we often heap too much credence upon the all-knowing fashion police in magazines, Hollywood, or gossip TV. Whether women like to hear it or not, the embarrassing truth is that we are creatures possessed of the herd mentality.

In my youth, on a small scale, I was immersed in the herd mentality; yet on a larger scale, I was shielded from it. I'll try to explain.

In elementary school, the fact that I had two friends who loved to wear tights just as much as me seems to have reinforced my initial fondness of tights. In a loose sense, we conformed to the prevailing fashion trend that existed within our own little sphere--dresses and tights, and later, pantyhose. We followed the herd, so to speak, within our own little microcosm.

At the same time, the mutual reinforcement within our little "pantyhose and tights" group had apparently shielded us from outside influences which tended to look upon pantyhose with ambivalence. Thus, in this sense, we strayed from the herd that was the female population as a whole in that we continued to wear pantyhose, even though most other girls didn't.

In college, I no longer had the "cover" of my friends who also loved wearing pantyhose. Thus, I gave in to peer pressure, and wore pantyhose and tights with much less frequency while on campus.

Why I love pantyhose (and tights)

Today, I wear pantyhose almost daily. Upon entering the workforce, I decided not to give in to the whims and quips of other women who complain about pantyhose. Elsewhere, I have mentioned insouciant reasons why I like pantyhose. I will try to expand on that list here.

- Pantyhose and tights make my legs look much better.
- They are versatile--the same outfit can be given a different look just by varying the hosiery.
- Men appreciate a woman tastefully dressed in fine hosiery.
- They feel good.
- They are distinctly feminine, and are one of the nice indulgences of being a woman.
- Skirts and dresses go hand in hand with pantyhose.

These are what stick out in my mind the most. There are a couple of other reasons, but I won't get into them here. I think that for the women like myself who actually like pantyhose, many of the reasons listed here would be the same for them.

Why I don't always reply to messages

This post isn't directed at anyone in particular. It is just a general reactionary statement in response to some of the messages I have received in my inbox and on the whiteboard.

If you are reading this post as a result of being directed to it by me, please know that I am somewhat reserved when it comes to responding to messages. This is why am using this generic response to address all messages I receive.

As I have stated in my first story, I joined Experience Project after having had a discussion with another woman about pantyhose. She was just one of a number of women I have met throughout my lifetime who have tried to convince me of how evil pantyhose are. As many of you know from my first blog post, my views are quite the opposite.

The sudden gush of attention generated from my posts has been flattering, but it has also left me a bit flustered. I would like to reveal that I do not have a Facebook, Myspace, Blog, or other "social networking" type of presence. What you are reading here on EP is my first attempt at blogging. I do have a minor presence elsewhere, but I shall not name it here.

In any case, I ask for your understanding if your messages go unanswered. It is nothing personal, and it is certainly not because I am trying to be rude. I do not take my anonymity for granted, and the open forum afforded me by Experience Project has been a welcome vehicle for me to air out my thoughts and opinions. That is the gist of it.

True, I do have certain buttons that can be pushed. However, for the most part, I am somewhat uncomfortable with responding to personal messages. There are some exceptions to this, but for now, I'll leave it at that.

Thank you for your understanding,

Commentary on pantyhose

An observation I've made over the years is that 100% of the people who react negatively to my wearing pantyhose are other women. I wear pantyhose 5 or 6 times a week. Not because we are required to wear them at work, but simply because I like pantyhose.

When I started my job, some of the other women would tell me, "You know, you don't have to wear pantyhose here."

Of course I knew this, but I'd tell them that I simply liked to wear them. Then I'd get an earful of how much they hated pantyhose and couldn't see how anyone in their right mind would willingly wear them. It was as if they were trying to impose their will upon me; how dare I not conform to the rigid mindset of pantyhose hatred.

I've observed that pantyhose hatred boils down to two main categories:
1. Comfort
2. Everything else, which I will call secondary complaints


As far as comfort goes, the most common complaints are that pantyhose sag, itch, and are hot.

After a lifetime of hearing unsolicited commentary from other women, I have learned that cheap pantyhose are almost universally to blame for being hot, itchy, or saggy. If said pantyhose are also the wrong size, that would only compound the problem.

For one, not all pantyhose are created equal. Many brands may look identical in construction, but differ vastly in comfort. Ever tried on a pair of boots? You know exactly what I'm talking about. Two brands may look virtually identical, but one may feel like a medieval tortue device, while the other feels cozy and comfortable. Go a size too small with the uncomfortable boot, and you make a bad problem even worse. It is the same with pantyhose.

There are finer brands of pantyhose in which the manufacturer is actually mindful of how the fabric feels against the skin. They do not itch, and actually feel quite silky. As for being hot--again, many finer brands offer sheer styles that don't go overboard on the coverage; and, certain styles are even constructed with double-covered Lycra, offering sheer coolness and appearance with the added benefit of durability.

As for size, let's not kid ourselves, we all have to deal with some degree of vanity when it comes to sizing our clothing. The same goes for pantyhose. Through experience, I know for a fact that pantyhose that are too small will always sag at the brief. They also do not allow as much freedom of movement. Not only that, the undue stress placed on the fabric of a pair of pantyhose that is too small greatly increases the potential to develop runs. Vanity shouldn't come into play when sizing pantyhose--nobody is going to know if I'm wearing a size S as opposed to a size XS.

Sagging at the ankles tends to occur in cheaper brands as during the course of the day, the body's natural heat stretches the yarns just enough out of shape such that the fit is no longer as intimate as it was when the garment was fresh. After a cold wash, notice how the fit is nearly restored? This repetitive cycle of stress and relief wears out cheaper brands in much shorter order than the finer brands. The finer brands also tend to stay put throughout the work day with much less ankle sagging.

Another paradox I have noticed among pantyhose haters is the fact that many of them wear control top. Given the opportunity to go bare legged, these women forego their control top hosiery and wear non-shaping underwear. This doesn't make sense; if these women weren't predisposed to wearing shapewear to begin with, why opt for control top when the need arises to wear pantyhose? In these cases, a great deal of discomfort can be alleviated merely by switching to a sheer to waist style; or, at the very least, a non-control top brief.

Secondary complaints

Pantyhose make me look like my grandmother
They are too delicate and run too easily
They take too long to put on
They make using the bathroom a chore
My legs are perfect, I don't need pantyhose

First of all, I loved my late grandmother dearly. But with that said, I had never known her to wear sheer, satin, fashion pantyhose. Or silky, sheer, gloss pantyhose. Or powdery fine pantyhose in daring or playful colors. The point here is that the stereotypical "grandmother" pantyhose is but a tiny segment in a vast array of diverse styles. This argument is akin to a woman saying she won't wear jeans because she doesn't want the 1970s Brooke Shields high-waist look; obviously, there are many other styles to choose from.

I admit that pantyhose do run. That is a fact of life. This sometimes goes hand in hand with the complaint that pantyhose take too long to put on--haste leads to calamity. I am never in such haste to don my pantyhose that I haphazardly slide my foot down the length of the hose leg, or forego moisturizing my heels (on my feet, not shoes) or my hands. In the decades since adolescence that I have worn pantyhose, I can probably count only two or three times when a pair has actually developed a snag or run when first putting them on--with proper care, it just doesn't happen.

As far as developing runs during the day, that does happen from time to time, but for me, it apparently doesn't occur nearly as often as it does to the pantyhose hating women. I suppose I have developed a sixth sense when it comes to avoiding potentially nylon-snagging obstacles around my legs.

Pantyhose also take no time to put on. It literally takes me 60 seconds or less to put on a pair. My schedule isn't so crammed that I can't take 60 seconds out of my morning routine to wear them. If it is such a time hog, just wake up 60 seconds sooner.

And while pantyhose do add an extra step to bathroom breaks, I am never in such a rush that I can't spare an extra 30 seconds to get them back on properly. It baffles me how some women at my workplace complain about this--as if every precious second in the bathroom spent adjusting pantyhose is one second less they have in the office. Seriously ladies, 30 seconds? Perhaps spend less time texting or online shopping, and some work may actually get done.

Regarding "perfect legs." Sorry, most of us don't have them. While I am not scarred or disfigured by any stretch, I am also not so deluded into believing that I can walk bare legged down a fashion runway. We all have blemishes, and pantyhose are a perfect way to show (and even enhance) our legs while simultaneously masking those blemishes. In a similar vein, why do we wear makeup? You absolutely cannot deny that makeup takes far more time and dedication to put on and maintain than pantyhose. Yet we still wear makeup.

A word about cost

There are reasons why most of the finer brands cost more.
- They use better yarns and are generally better constructed
- They are much more comfortable
- They are more durable, all other things being equal

Let's look at an analogy. Compare genuine Manolo or Ferragamo shoes to department store specials. You really do get what you pay for. The designer brands are a joy to wear in terms of comfort. And in terms of durability, the designer brands are crafted to much higher standards--they are bulletproof.

But fine pantyhose are an even better value if you compare relative scales of cost. A decent pair of pantyhose from a good European brand can run anywhere from $12 to $22, give or take. I can often get up to ten wearings per pair, some much more when the denier is higher. Compare that to just a couple of wearings from the cheap, $1.99 to $5 pantyhose, and suddenly the "cheap" pantyhose aren't so cheap anymore.

Closing thoughts

I have observed that the biggest hurdle to pantyhose acceptance among women is comfort.

By dismissing pantyhose simply because they don't feel good, it is easy to tack on countless secondary complaints to validate pantyhose hatred. Yet, eliminate the discomfort factor, and I'm sure it would be surprising to see how much of the secondary issues we'd put up with; in fact, many of the secondary issues wouldn't be issues at all if looked at objectively and addressed sensibly.

As I have stated, makeup takes much more dedication, but is essentially "comfortable" in that once it's on, you don't notice it. And why do we wear makeup? Because it helps enhance our appeal, despite the hassle; with fine pantyhose, it is the same.

I am dedicated to my man. But admittedly, I still love the looks my legs get from men in general when I'm wearing pantyhose; men simply love the look of women tastefully dressed in fine pantyhose! I have never received a negative comment from a man regarding my choice of hosiery. All male reactions have been universally pleasant or even flattering. Sometimes they take the form of second or third admiring glances; the more forthcoming gentlemen go so far as to offer verbal compliments.

Back in college, I didn't wear pantyhose nearly as often as I do now, mostly because of peer pressure. Whatever time I did spend in hosiery was equally split between sheer pantyhose and opaque tights. In no way was I ever going to be a supermodel, but whenever I wore hosiery while clubbing, I was unfailingly the recipient of far more favorable attention from males than whenever I went without hose. Bottom line--men do love pantyhose, and if I own brands that actually feel good, why not wear them?

Do I wear pantyhose just to impress men? Yes and no. Yes, in the same sense that I wear makeup every day; no, in the sense that I already have a man who loves me, and I really have no desire to attract any other men. I also know that it is a selfish sense of empowerment, but I really enjoy the extra attention I command from my man (and other men) whenever I wear pantyhose. They are something that feel good on me, and make me look good.

I hope that this short essay has helped to open the minds of at least a few ladies to the idea of wearing comfortable, fashionable pantyhose.

1-16 of 16 Blogs   

Previous Posts
Ghosts of poops past, posted December 18th, 2012
Husband carrying wife's purse, posted November 23rd, 2012
Eternal love, posted July 13th, 2012
Meow, posted August 2nd, 2011
This is a test post, posted August 2nd, 2011
Extreme Makeover... er... Extremely Funny Makeover, posted April 4th, 2011
Tsunami, posted March 11th, 2011
Tsunami headed my way, posted March 11th, 2011
Just thinking out loud, posted March 4th, 2011
Deadly pantyhose: Wolford Fatal 15 and Fatal Lace, posted February 14th, 2011, 3 comments
Relationships involving men who love pantyhose, posted February 12th, 2011, 8 comments
My views on men who wear pantyhose, posted February 11th, 2011, 25 comments
Blogging is fun, posted January 29th, 2011
Why I love pantyhose, posted January 9th, 2011, 1 comment
Why I don't always reply to messages, posted December 18th, 2010, 1 comment
Commentary on pantyhose, posted November 17th, 2010, 4 comments

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